What are parents afraid of? 10 MYTHS
Parenthood is not only a great joy but also a great responsibility. Often young parents – when becoming aware of this responsibility develop anxiety. Anxiety creates fears. What do parents fear?
Fear of not giving the child anything that will help reveal their potential. This fear overwhelms the vast majority of parents. It is not surprising, as the economic situation is extremely unstable. However, research shows the opposite: children who have a limited number of toys and games think outside the box and quickly learn not to depend on the circumstances. So do not rush to buy up all the available developmental toys and send the child to all clubs, even if all your fellow-moms from the playground have already sent their kids to a kids' center. Watch your little one and buy what you can afford.
Fear of abuse by strangers. From time to time the media report about child abuse or maltreatment. These facts sink into heart, so it seems that it happens often. In fact, such cases are very, very rare. Moreover, children more often suffer from members of their own family rather than strangers. Despite this, of course, you need to teach the kid how to react to offers of strangers, aggression of peers, and so on.
Fear of an accident or injury. Again, accidents happen rarely. Of course, much depends on the child himself. That's why you, as parents, should child-proof your home: put protection on sharp edges of the table, close outlets, keep medicine and chemicals out of kids' reach etc. Ollder children should be told about potential hazards of certain actions.
Fear of the child being underweight or overweight. This applies to children of all ages. Young parents are intimidated from the first months: either the baby is gaining too little ("she's hungry!"), or too much ("you give her more than needed!"). In fact, you know your child best. If you see that your child feels well, she is not starving or suffering from excess weight, do not worry. It is in your power to assure the child gets healthy age-appropriate food and psychological comfort, so that she eats just as much as her body needs it. All the rest is physiology and genetics.
Fear that the relationship with the partner dies out. Hormones change your attitude to sex. The time that you have previously spent with your partner now belongs to the baby. In fact, in most cases, this situation is beginning to change already shortly after childbirth. When you get used to your new status, it will get even better than before, because now there's one more thing to string you together.
Fear that your career will be negatively affected. It may indeed seem like that first. But take a look around: are all successful women (both among your friends and celebrities) alone and childless? No, on the contrary, they are mostly happy with their motherhood.
Fear that you won’t be able to breastfeed. According to statistics, only 3% of women cannot breastfeed the baby. For all the rest there is an extensive methodology for lactation support. But even if you cannot breastfeed for so long or to the extent you wish you should not blame yourself. In any case, you are the best mother for you kid.
Fear of spoiling the child. Recently it is widely believed that the baby is impossible to be spoiled before her first birthday. Remember, the attention that is required by the child is usually not a whim but a natural need.
Fear that something will go wrong in your parenting. Some fear that they are not able to bring up a daughter / son. Others fear that they will not be a good role model for their child. Still others fear that they will fail to cultivate a strong (creative, independent, successful) personality. Just listen to the child and trust your intuition.
Fear of being a bad mother. - Especially in the eyes of others. This applies, especially at first, when you have no experience. The baby cries, or she has a runny nose, or rash on the cheeks, or she's still not crawling or talking? Mothers tend to blame themselves, in addition all sorts of experienced advisers suddenly have become parenting experts. Rely less on others' opinion, and trust yourself more. For peace of mind, self-confidence and love are the three components of successful motherhood.